Dear OK Chick,
So I met her waaaay back in the day when she went to my friend’s church. It was when I lived here the summer of 04’. She had moved into the room I was renting when I left. We went out to grab a bite (not a date, just hanging out) and I had one of those jaw on the floor moments when she said she was a teacher, and she has this amazing faith. I had just gotten dumped and was moving to simi so I didn't ask for her number or anything. Fast forward a few years and she pops up on my friend’s facebook. I befriend her and say hola, let her know I'm moving down to s.d. and see if she wants to grab some rolled tacos again (I remember she really liked those). She says that sounds cool, and then the next day sends me a message saying she's taking a break from talking to guys, but appreciates the thought. It's been like 3 months now and I'm not sure how to approach her again.
Your CA friend
Dear CA friend,
Thanks for the email! First off CA Friend, I would like to give you props for making the first move; for this I applaud you. Seriously, I would say 55% of guys just sit back and wait for God to smack them over the head. Another 20% wait for God to actually speak to them- Son, ask out that poor girl! However, you are in the rare 25% that are actually proactive and not creepy proactive. You asked her to join you in a meal of rolled tacos, which I don’t know what that is but it sounds great!
Here are my thoughts:
#1- She really is taking a break from guys. Her reasoning could be; religion, traveling a lot, recently was hurt by a male, or just hates guys in general. I think 3 months is a suitable break. I believe you could send her a quick message- how about some rolled tacos? Be breezy in your message, but not breezy like Monica on Friends. Monica actually tells Richard’s answering machine that she’s being breezy. Don’t do that. But let her know that you still want to share some rolled tacos with her when she’s done with her “No Guys Sabbatical."
#2- Her taste buds have changed. She might not be into rolled tacos anymore. I know it’s a weak point, but valid one. You might see about another type of food. Perhaps Chinese is her thing now?
#3- She might not be into you. I’m sorry, but I’m calling it like I see it. No one said dating was easy. Girls have to go through this crap all the time, and it appears guys have to go through it too. I’m talking about the whole- are they blowing me off or giving me a ligament reason. It’s a fine line. CA Friend, you are a cool dude, and funny as all get out. I can say this because…well I know you in person. If this girl can't see that an evening out with you would be an enjoyable one, then you might need to send her packing. Move on brother. I got a girl out in WI who's looking. She wouldn't turn down a rolled taco. Heck, I wouldn't turn down a rolled taco! I hope this helps.
Your OK Friend,